Yes and i had to read such a condescending article on coldplay, which makes them sound so cliche. Hai... at olivia's house now and i have no intention to sleep, well for now that is. Some of us are loitering on the bed, playing PS2 and yea i'm online. WHich i really cool. I never really got to stay over at anyone's house this easy. but i guess sometimes juz happen, when they seem most impossible. The matrix was alright to me though. I didn't find the speed too slow, juz too much emphasis on love and trust and all that crap. Not in the mood for such highly strung lovey dovey poop right now. And the ending was simply bright sunshine... like wtf. oh well, nonetheless, i've got to commend their great and talented efforts placed into animating the whole damn thing. i can't even function macromedia. haha. had a failed attempt todae. i dunno wvat the hell am i doing not socializing actually. good night world. i dont deserve yoU.
i think it's really quite sad that my mom is amusing herself with a karaoke system that tells you "bravo" or "take a bow" after u finished a song. She's really happy when she gets bravo. but i find is distastefully pathetic. Hai.... i guess it's just me. Today was kinda cool. i think i ate lots today. fish burger, onion rings, fLies, a very melted ultimate mocha, and an earth quake cookie! yay! :) haha k not very yay but still it was nice eating those things. :)) i can't deny. had fun squeezing fries, onion rings and even my fish patty! yay this rox. haha and walking at night is town. Zara was a pretty sight. Coincidence made "the aviator's girlfriend" appear on a t shirt. but coincidence doesn't mean love or we're meant to be. I've learnt my lesson! but hey i found a new nice place to mug. goodie too too. The stuff at nike was really nice too. but yea everything has a nice price to pay. yeaaaa wadever. The pretty cars come out at night. oooo i saw the 7 series bmw, a nice yellow porche, etc. quite a lo0t of fanciful cars for one night i must sae. :) and the light drizzle is icy air simply reminds me of london. but i should be sleeping n my dad's staring. here's to the night. :) ole.
been drifting. need to get back. all this great influx of influence from the outside world is too much to handle. but at least i know what to do. i dun wanna go school tomorrow. good night!
Enough bout marks... i've kinda decided that yes the grades would fluctuate no matter wat. It's kinda hillarious now coz everyone's rushing for PROJECT WORK! haha all this mad rush to do a nice written report... At the bookshop, where i was glueing my 6 yr old nike tennis shoes, there were so many students coming in to buy diskettes for PW!! I even met SK online and had more company for the late night and early morning... It's econs now... MR CHUA. HE's rather kind. helped me alot in my last minute studying for econ and i really really appreciate his thanks... yet he's still an amateur and sometimes i think he simply works for the money...My day will come one day. :) skiddle off now.I see JC life very differently now... glad i'm able to realise it. Better now, than never. :) tas world. and Tas my lovely trustable blog.
joys and woes FOREVER In the afternoon, we had baptism of chloe, the daughter of marlic and charlie. rather neat experience because i was so ignorant of how things were going to turn out... LOL i dunno how the priest can keep is condesention and anger with people who are so unprepared even in front of a ritual. but i dunno, maybe bcoz everyone's first time is this way? and they'd learn? All i know is, the baby kept cryin, and we had an incredulously early dinner. there was the food spree at watson's today where my mom and I wilfully bought packets of orange chocolate kit kat(!!!) and mint kit kat, muesli bars, raisin chocs and rice chocolates! Choco freak! woohoo... hahaha the sight of chocolate is a very pretty one. chocolate buffet... slurp burp~ I had tuition till ten today...quite tiring. the teacher's quite weird too. haha he reminds me of a lion. He kept saying, "yar, okay, erm, okay" like so many OKAYS! Like stop saying OKAYS at nothing! Adon came from dhoby. She dressed up like she was going to the beach, not town. haha. TYPICAL. we rode the tutor's car back to my house and we couldnt find each other for a while. Like where's Tian Poh and where's Poh Heng?? :) Talked to really nice pple today too...i enjoyed the conversation nonetheless... it's inspiring chewy!! hahaha and the guitar strumming on da phone was cool too.I heard snippets from tears in heaven, creed's one last breath, some boyzone songs as well. THANK you thannk you for making this dae possible. PLUS plUs PLUS, power 98 was playing a whole range of acoustics! Lovely music that keeps one awake. I like the verve's, john mayer's and Jason Miraz's acoustic version of their songs, the best! The verve is especially nice..."And i'm a different million people one day to the next, i can't change my mould, no no no no no." Then there was this song that reminded me of adele, the MYSTERIOUS ASIAN TEMPTRESS. lol... :) generally, i'm in a glad mood. BUT the surface is always smudged with blotches of the downside of my no-sleep-marathon. I wasn't as productive as i would like to be... Yet baaaaaaaaah... i dunno. guess i just gotta improve on it next time.seriously dun wanna go for classes next week... :(feel sad agn. argggg
i should wear some clothes
sunday.
i have weekly friday flu yesterday del came chilling @ my house and i went to the airport to celebrate edith's birthday... yea they all looked good yesterday. edith too! like wau. hehee i think it's the looking older/more mature thing la... soon we'll be complaining we're all looking too old. just did another logo for my fone! itchy fingers.... gonna sleep now... i still have lotsa math to do... too tired to study. not tired to design stuff... maybe coz it doesnt require much brain work... good night werld. muaH.
Today i virtually saw the whole world. Jiaxian and co were sitting next to me at Lido Theatre one where we watched Pirates.... I jus wanna talk about good things... but yea i had a mental block during the chem test today... terrible. Yesterday i couldn't sleep coz i was thinking bout all the chem crap and also other stuff that made me cry for a while. Sometimes people jus cry for no stupid reason at all...and also for very stupid reasons...But yes god put me to sleep...i'm so thankful for that... You are stronger than you think-
remember to stand tall.
Every challenge in your life
helps you to grow.
Every problem you encounter
strengthens your mind and your soul.
Every trouble you overcome
increases your understanding of life.
When all your troubles weigh heavily
on your shoulders,
remember that beneath the burden
you can stand tall,
because you are never given
more than you can handle-
and you are stronger
than you think.
by Lisa Wrobel
and i'm glad people actually write these stuff...coz everybody hurts sometimes...and everybody breaks sometimes.But that aside, Happy Belated Birthday Nat!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) :) :)
i keep falling asleep with the lights on I went shopping once again yesterday and Del bought me a nice red Laquer plate from The Chapalang Shop. Man i'm gonna eat all my meals on that plate from now on. :) Also we patronized the new spotlight. So much more fabric and of course not forgetting the artsy fartsy stuff! We were pulling blue tins and banging into people... And she said i looked damn tai tai yesterday... Yes i felt bohemian yesterday. Wore the new top i bought from Fond Hugs. Man the clothes there are pretty and cool and comfortable. I told my mom i was doing pw and then went shopping. Also... i wore my new Jwest slippers that were so nice and soft to walk on. :) Thanks to my mom... We blew 500 bucks shopping on saturday. And i purchased her a mama skirt from fond hugs which was a extorting 60 bucks! i didn't noe. So yes my reserves are running dry and i must save again :) We visited Muee yesterday too and spent quite a lot of time in the shop. I wanted to buy the whole shop! well almost (except all those lian bags) I wanted to buy the toys and the cups and the stylish ang pows. Oh then we went to the basement and i saw some SA council people. nice to see familiar faces on the street. listening to third eye blind now... the songs just get sadder and sadder! the background almost killed my mood to write this journal.... Okay i have to meet my group mates in ten minutes time. they're gonna Pw at my house! yay! my room is like a pig sty. After eating at Pasta Cafe with my mom (fusion food rocks) i came home to do my art project. haha it's almost done! i miss writing in my diary. i miss the touch of the smooth red odd smelling indian leather. i miss painting the whole paper and holding a paint brush. i miss the colours and the liberty to paint what my heart sings to my head. :) hahaha i shsll now do what i purposefully came to this journal to do... Closing time,
Love is a bird, she needs to fly somethings are easier said than done. I feel the pangs of it today and i'm throwing my homework into the chute for now for no reason at all... This week has been better in a sense. I got more sleep, i did more exercise. But there are somethings tt persist and there are somethings that herald for redress. So an ad hoc agreement was made yesterday. Why is it only when things end we feel the punch? ... Yes i should remind myself of detestful times to make it easier for me to deal. Besides, that would make things have a more all-rounded unbiased view... At the end of the day, i can moan and groan and twidle and wither away but it boils down to the same thing. The atavistic human reaction to loss and change is the best way to self destruct. But i dont wanna self destruct. I wanna lift off and soar... yesterday afternoon, i thought to myself that i needed someone to pour all my sad songs to. Some unfortunate people had to bear the grunt of this habit of mine (my funnie duddie). "What can I do" started coming out of my mouth... Oh but now i've got the perfect reason and person to pour all my sad songs to. but i wont. :)I have no capacity to love. Dont cry because it's over, smile because it happened. Why stick myself in a culdesac when impossible was starring right at my face? An eventful ten months of my life. THe day will come when we would have grown, says Shen. Let's start getting things back into order. Let's try emailing wong meilin and making condom designs....lol.
after econs test last week...
There I stood, on the platform, carrying my black duffle bag, which I shoved all my Economics notes into after the two-hour test, feeling more of thinking, what would be best. I imagined going to town alone and looking for items at the newly open Spotlight and wanting to buy the whole arts section of the shop, which could be quite a turn off as I always forgot how little I had in my bank. I imagined, knocking into other friends in town and engaging into light superficial conversations whereby one had to put a chagrin smile across one’s face and find for things to say, which felt like a turn off too because the prospects of success seemed like a Cinderella dream, too barren and dry to even begin with, unless the Fairy God Mother comes to the rescue.
In the bleakness of my thoughts, my train came, prodding at quick speeds in the glimmer and harshness of the brazen sun. Poised in my haughty model manqué, I stood strategically behind the yellow line. And as the train came to a halt, it blew a fresh bout of wind onto my shoulder length hair, making me feel pulchritude and confidence. So I hopped on the North-South line, back home with a surge of contentment in my heart. Sure, I took the same route home everyday; I passed by the same scenic, tranquil and blue reservoir which I always wanted to visit more often; I see the same sports stadium and wonder when I would ever bother to take a trip to their newly built gym; I pass by the tuition centre where I could spend five hours in, practicing my physics and math and I relish in that memory like I had a ravenous appetite. Things new would gradually grow old. The gym wouldn’t be termed “new” much longer; the reservoir may look even prettier in the future; that dingy building where my tuition centre was, might be demolished for something else, a few years down the road. The realization dawned on me that everyday I will travel pass these unforgettable places of my interest, and watch them decay, disappear or polish with time. The hunger was killing me. I’ve heard my stomach growl unhappily during the test, so my brain starting working on what I felt like eating. No, not my usual bread from Four Leaves Bakery, nor a small red bean pancake from Jollibean. I was tired of these daily treats. Today, I wanted something out of the routine. A sort of savoir came to my rescue as I pranced across the dark underpass to Northpoint Shopping centre. An old lady, clad in an all too familiar red and black Mc Donald uniform, was holding a stack of discount coupons and waving them in desperation. I beamed inside my head and went over to take one. The perforated A3 sized piece of paper had many food items on discount! My eyes greedily scanned for the most low calorie breakfast I could purchase from fattening Mc Donalds. Egg Mc muffin without cheese nor ham? Oh that was so not value for money. How about Red bean pie? Oh too much bad sugar! Hash browns? At a dollar? That would do fine. I miss that oily fine tasting thing, ironically speaking. Or is it ironic?
Today went pass very quickly coz it was basically all lectures...The only thing i'm inspired to do right now is Project Work and GP news articles. I feel e need to get updated once again. Sometimes i jus feel so laaaazy. Glad i went for cheena tuition on tuesday too! THe thing bout procastination, is you'll never know how it feels NOT PROCASTINATING, until you've decided to stop! THe feeling is so unpredictable. Procastination chains one into a contiuous dread.... Today is adele's mother's birthday! happy birthday auntie!!!!!! haha wvat a useless greeting. she'll never read this. In the toilet, del was trying to block wuiern from going into e cubicle. she was struggling and giggling at the same time and her cheeks turned adorably red. Her eyes shrank into curvy sickle shaped things as well...lol. Eyes are fascinating... :) then i recalled bullemia and how people actually spit what the eat out. change spit to vomit... Never tried. Want to but i dont dare and i don't know how to! And it seems everyone there is experienced in it except me! such an ulu pandan! hahaha maybe one dae one dae i'll go try. project work was zany again...did i ever mention how ZANY our project meetings can get?? Samson has now 7 names! THey are: Samson Hussien, Mojojojo, Karl MArx, SAmson sources, condom man,yong tau fu boy, raspberry. Meijun, Sieyieh, adele and me were laughing quite terribly. and we kept doing a "woohoo" sound in unison for every thing we find that is an accomplishment. eg, Samson staying up to do up the written report, samson bringing in so much joy and laugther for e group. He has his lame side too k? we're not bullying him! :)Besides that, on saturday, our group kept laughing in the library and later at Burger King we laughed even more! the three tables beside us became empty....lol. familiar lines like"We're in a public place...", "It's in the sources. We have the sources!", "Please dont start...", made us laugh till our tummies hurt. I was like a laughing like a joystick, as observed by Meijun and Adele. Dunno la... everything felt so funny that day... and i was laughing left right front back. On sunday though, i went for dance concert at Cadelcott! woohoo! elation. It was great (sorta), especially the NUS dance. Their skirts were huge and flared up and of pure white colour. The guys wore the same skirt as well which covered all of their legs except the feet. Music for the dance was serene. DAnce moves were not suggestive and slutty, but coordinated and gentle and Zen-ish. Applause!!! My ex SA form teacher danced too! oh he looked so perverted! :)Jiwen did too much workout and has a too fake-friendly a face, it just spoils e notion even further to get to know him better! Yikes... The place i want to be is...home. So tired by the end of today,i couldn't stand going for extra chem lessons...with this new teacher...i dun need a chem tutor anymore... shall tell my tution teacher tata & farewell on friday...damnit which is tomorrow. ALl the JCS are really getting into the national day mood, where everyone's like performing here and there.... Man...tell me wvat does a eurasian wear!??? i hope wvat i wear tmr is acceptable... crosses fingers... which reminds me i have to give coupon money by tmr! it is oh so overdued...(my teacher was so pissed with me...My Reaction:"growls!") Also... i have to memorize my tiny speech! I forgot about them all!!!But in SAJC, AJC takes on a new meaning... it's tragic what just happened. damn la... She feels bad. He's contented just as long as she's happy?? oh well...let's hope these emotionally wrecked parties pick up the pieces and move on. WHo knoes wvat the future holds...On another note, my school's LD play has been canceled. Study hard perhaps would b wvat i have to say to my seniors?? :)"But you thank thee lord...for each trial that comes my way...for this way i grow strong." and definitely...b4 i end... i must thank god for giving me e strength to get through another day. He talks to me in so many ways.
i know the lord will make a way for me Yes so that was how i felt. Things got better towards the end of the day. I had eye opening LD. Friday:TOday, i started of quite happily but towards the end of the day, my computer hung, i knew samson wasn't happy doing last min work, my pw was going facing more and more red tape,i had to redo my econs essay again, i felt so lost in econs i felt like giving up, we had to do an essay on GLOBALIZATION... like wvat the...toot! BUt now the dae is almost at it's close... it feels so much better. Ive managed to over come all those set backs and negative thoughts. It's much easier now to realise that these bad things were only there to help me. to remind me i have to put in more effort in econs and not get complacent? To redo my letter of request coz e edited version would make our request have a higher success rate? That globalization essay doing actually turned out quite fun. If adele didn't start being mad and cranky, i wouldn't have survived GP!!!etc... So later at night... since my friends all couldn't make it for Fluid Fusion, i figured, forget it, let's not go... My mom told me it was stunningly spectacular. damn,...wvhy did i miss it?? LOL. sigh... they only had one rehershal! A many cheers to St nicks! POor Sec 4s though... I went to get specs with del darling and her lovely aunt. Sat a toyota camry! Rocking! haha i was introed to Purvis Street(sounds like perverse street) where the famous Chin CHin restaurant was! Along the whole stretch were food chains... i like streets with nice shop houses that are all cafes and bars with clear glass windows, a nice door to accompany it and customers talking gaily over dinner. It's a pretty sight to me la... Adele was OBSESSIVELY IN LOVE with herself today it was MADNESS!!!!! "i look so chio" was the line that came out of her mouth most often. With many mirrors around and loads of funky glasses to try on, she'll get delirious! LOL...After specctacle chosing, i went ta meet "monnatkey"and we spooned over nice nice soup at city hall! We ordered Tutti fruity chicken and Velvetty Mushroom. yummie tum tum. Bread with soup rocks! and nat stones. LOL...yea the potato wedges were nice too and i did the classic, Squish-out-e-oil-thing to my wedges. heehee. okae... i cant seem to finish rattling. Feeling positively glad now. :) dont underestimate -glAd...
hanging by your words...
Today...there was LD. announcing of exco. yep. simple, short and sweet. Trying not to be too enthusiatic and keep myself on the ground and remind myself i have loads of homework to do... God has his way. i thank god for everything that comes my wae... but i hope i wont let my emotions get the best of me. mixed feelings... i want to lose weight. i want to run everyday. i want to do well in bio. i want to do well in my studies. i want to contribute to my cca. so many wants... not too good. maybe i'll go church tmr. i've been avoiding the place for two daes for no stupid reason. worse thing is i spend my time doing quite a lot of rubbish... i shall stop contradicting myself this very very moment!!! poof awae.
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