it's wretchedly draining and masochistic to not sleep enough and thjnk bout not sleeping again. i can't even do sigma properly... although i was in the pretentuous act of understanding wat was going on. It's like surviving without water when ur in a desert. Todae Adonsia and me Ponned PW as usual... and we influenced Agnes and April to skip it too!!! we were so scared when we walked pass the ever watchful cameras at the gate and the general office where all the school's power people worked... ladidums. we got out anywae and he saved.thirty mintues of our time? LOL. anywae...i finally got the chance to go online and update my journal. Things are starting to change in Aj. It isn't tt bad, wat del would call, bearable. You go there and live my it's rules and wants because u have no other choice. ANd we won't die if things are this wae. i dun even know what i'm writing... haven't checked in to EBLA for anderson JC and a whole lot of nonsense. didn't do anything substancial todae... all for the sake of econs. oh well, our GPteacher's good!! everything i do... i fall asleep! GOOD NIGHT... there is no point rambling pointlessly...
Wednesday, April 16, 2003 09:59 a.m.

I love stretching after running. It’s the most beautiful feeling sometimes. :)
Also, been putting a lot of thought into the fact tt I am so distracted and mind is full of here and theres. And I think tt tt’s quite bad. Academically wise as well. So I gotta concentrate. Then I ask myself, do I get carried away? Well I dun really noe how to explain but when I get carried away, I actually know I’m getting carried away. I worry in my head but I dun stop what I’m doing. I continue and in the end I don’t really enjoy what I’m doing. So where’s the whole purpose? Is this just me or is a natural tendency for all human beings?? guess who gave mee tt ad ice :)
lied down on the sit-up bench and looked the sky turn from grey too blue to sea blue.
saw the empty peaceful sky and clouds hardly moving.
saw birds suddenly fleeting across in droves like tiny black butterflies to the trees across the canal. I was rather shocked. Never really enjoyed watching birds flying but I saw a sudden beauty in this nature act. Haha oh whatever…
Whatever it was, it was lovely to sit down and stone and think bout things as u watch a stagnant placemat of clouds above you.
then while I was doing the warm downs, a sudden cool zephyr blew onto my face like a message and gift from god. Wat blessed dae : ) .
I gtg now. Del, hope ur com gets better. Heehee. ManU –5 newCastle-1. oh well…wat can I sae. Lol.
Saturday, April 12, 2003 08:44 p.m.

no ajc is no longer the worst JC in singapore shaaawn. LOL. hais
when i read something, my mind seems to drift off else where esp when i'm reading BIO. all tt carbo, proteins and lipids. Proteins are worst. they have electrical charges summore!!! but all is well i took five long hours reading but 50 pages of notes which i barely understand.I so wanted to write in my red leather journal... but i was studying in the living room so tt's a NONO. dad's ard. Mom's at some fashion show. ladidums, i took a glance at my life todae. Snippets of here and there breezed through my head while i was trying to understand hypobolic,polar,matrix,blah blah blah. And i dunno. the feeling was quite amazing. It was so sudden, like being hit by a train. And the train carries all ur thoughts. and everything passes through your soul so quickly. It enters and leave and the influx is soo great. THere were really good memories and really detesting ones tt make u feel like puking and running away from it all.

i'm quite anti todae. don't really feel like taLking. damn my dad just asked me wat phoneline i'm using. i said prepaid.lied again. well i'm more annoyed he asked me. wish he didnt!

altered my uniform too. i sooo enjoyed the stroll under the clouds tt blocked the scorching sun. and the tingling cool breeze tt accompanied it. like yay. something was missing though. i wanted to TALK on the phone. but no free incoming in the dae. oh well. i dun seek for paradise. take care world. jan's gotta rUn.
Saturday, April 12, 2003 05:46 p.m.

"instead of exercise, u exorcise...." The result of insufficient sleep. courtesy of the brown cow:"today was tiger day and i went for clASs outing with only 3pple and then we went to look aT houses. do u like semi d house or condo house, haiyah okae, err, and then after tt we went to caleb's house. caleb has a private line. (stirs awake) oh wat did i sae ah?? i can't remember wat i'm saying lor. and then we went to Nat's house and we went upstairs. there was a big attic. in the attic there was a big... in the morning we gotta wake up. huh?? don't laugh don't laugh it's not funny. and then and then took the bus to...to to eat sushi and then we play carom,ocean n they live happily ever after. no more. " yes and tt came with a lot of wake up calls, basically after every sentence. harhar oh well. good morning world. i was so glad to have watched the matrix. talking to cel online. we're so mad... hahaha n i feasted on belgian chocs todae and had my lunch at the holland v bread talk. it's the best bread talk branch! they have foccacias, naans, wholemeal anpan! they were heavenlY! harharcome on click this thing
Monday, April 7, 2003 03:01 p.m.

i am anGsty...Listening to the 8 mile cd. blasting it on the com but my mom's watching CNN agaIn... sian. she wants to tune into CNN da whole dae. even del thinks it's madness. oh wadever. i forgot to take extreme for dinner. toopid me :(
And my parents took my hp! siGhz. wadever for?!?! it's the hols! kaninaaaaaaaaa.
i mean hello, u guys can watch TV till three am in the morning, ur using electricity, your paying for tt activity too. so wat's with talking on the phone after 11. i mean, gimme a better reason at least?? wadever la. like i can do anything bout it.
Del came over todae and we baked CHOCOLATE CHUNK COOKIESyum yum.Baking with Miss "quEEn of hearts" was damn fun.we burnt the first batch of cookies. A hillarious, messed up, lame, retarded, crappy, calorie-ish activity!haha later we played uno and then when my parents were out, we mixed VOdka with Bailey's. Tt was quite strong but the creme was not as thick as usual. it was 75% vodka see. Later we simply drank Bailey's and i got bit red...again. wooPz. harhar and we were juz rotting infront of the TV, switching btween the lame Romancing the Stone & MTV. haha really guud fun. :) THankZ, u phishpillai. the SArS hol extends till thursday. siaNz. i'm foreva confined at homme! sometimes i dunno why my parents do things...hai. i shall stop complaining. coz i'll nvr be satisfied if i keep on doing so.
greater is the golden of silence...greater is the unspoken awareness...--wise words
thanks to all who have given me inspiration. thanks to all who have comforted me.
Saturday, April 5, 2003 11:27 p.m.

Hae hae pitas pitas ;) gonna do banana bread tonight. Juz waitin for the bananas to arrive at the mama shop at the next block! Woohoo! And I ate fat free instant noodles todae. But I couldn’t finish it. Flushed some of it down the toiletbowl (while my dad was washing the dishes) and the rest I would eat tomorrow (yucccckkksssss….)
listening to bean’s cd. The only one with Sway by Bic Runga. Nat already noe how to play it on the piano.woaH~ He is one Talented Mr Ripley. Oh tt is such a mad and gay show. No offence to gays. I think gays are alright! Would always remember my uncle’s words that “gays are just guys in the wrong bodies”. And Nat isn’t gay. Lol. “She’s addicted to nicotine patches”. Man I love tori Amos ;) but now Jay Chou is on and it brings back many memories once again.
yesterday I had a great laugh about my entry in Spanish. The grammar was all wrong bcoz I typed a paragraph of words in Babelfish and requested translation. Shawn why didn’t u tell me!! Bet u didn’t understand the entry!! Haha neither do I. jan misses s74.

pitas*
talk to me*
poEms*
Library*Babelfish*

i did it. i did it. i did it! yay happy :) thank god! okaes... i'm elated. here are the pictures :)
modifiedme
chalet 2nd floor pic
Joanne and daryl
Gordon and the curtains
Mr Ho in Audi
Shake that ass
Saints and the finger